I haven’t been to Mass a lot in the last year. But really, other than when I’ve been presiding I haven’t been to Mass much in a long time.
In the Jesuits the goal is always to go to Mass as often as possible, to let ourselves be nourished by the Eucharist. But as a priest I found it harder and harder to go to Sunday Mass. I would interrogate myself about that—What, I’m only interested if I’m in charge, or I get to speak?
But actually it felt more like going in to work on your day off. Like, come on. I need a break, too.
Much to my spiritual director’s amusement, during Lent I decided to go each Sunday. So your Lenten penance is to go to church?, he asked me. Um, yeah.
It was an interesting experience. When you’re sitting the pews, you see things that are not so obvious from the sanctuary. They’re probably things most Catholics already know. But they were news to me.
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