EPISODE 704: BAMBI PLAYING THE LONG GAME
Are you ready for some footsocks?
POP CULTURE SPIRIT WOW
Hi y’all. Super Bowl Sunday. Are you ready for some footrubs?
What?
How about some footsocks?
Um…sure, it’s winter, socks are pretty much mandatory right now.
Do you really call them footsocks? Because--
Yeah! How about some foot and mouth disease?
What? No. That’s not a thing.
WOW, speciesist much?
I mean, probably, but it’s HOOF and mouth, not FOOT and mouth.
Potato potato.
More like potato tomato, you lunk head.
How about some football? Are you ready for--
You know the thing I love about that catchphrase is that it’s so accurate. Typical American football game, you’re going to watch what, 60 minutes of football? “Some.” Meanwhile the broadcast will be longer than the Oscars.
Probably not the best lead in to Super Bowl Sunday…
Go Rams?
Is that better?
Eh.
It was a busy week. I wrote lots of stuff about The Book of Boba Fett (aka Sleepy Jane and the FunTime Gang), whether Jesus is cringe and also what it means when pretty much every Oscar nominee is the story of young people being asked to save the universe/planet/their family and the adults are pretty much like, cool, go do that.
(Hint: It’s not a great thing.)
I also managed to hack into our systems Friday afternoon long enough to upload this frothy bit of nonsense about 5 Super Bowl commercials I wish the Catholic Church would make.
Seems a little desperate. You want to do comedy, try an open mike night.
I’ll take it where I can get it and/or force it via the things I learned rewatching War Games.
Um, What is that?
The 1983 classic dramedy starring a teenage Matthew Broderick about a kid who accidentally makes a supercomputer at NORAD think the Russians are launching all of their nukes and almost destroys everyone.
1983. Lord. No one knows what that is.
“Would you like to play a game?” No?
No. Also, seriously, a comedy about nuclear annihilation?
I mean it did have a lot of urgency.
…
No, you’re right the 80s were weird about that stuff.
Anyway not a lot to report in between everything other than my fingers are sore and based on the fact I’m arguing with myself in this newsletter I’m thinking my brain might need a bit of a breather, too.
I officially declare next week a week off!
Shut up, that’s up to me.
But yes, let’s do that. No newsletter next week while I attempt to heal the rift in my brain.
I’m not going anywhere.
Stop.
While I’m recovering, here’s a couple things I’m catching up on:
1) Abbott Elementary—This is a relatively new show on ABC; it’s a sitcom about teachers in an inner city grade school in Philadelphia, shot like Modern Family, with people actively talking to the camera, but more with the vibe of The Office. It’s just really heartwarming and funny, and in some ways feels like the perfect show for where we are right now. (Also, it has SUCH respect for teachers, which I love.)
Here’s an interview with the creator and lead, Quinta Brunson.
2) The Sister Boniface Mysteries – This is a spinoff of The Father Brown Mysteries, which I have to admit I do not like at all; he is so completely unlikable.
Oh please, Father Brown is wonderful.
No, Sister Boniface is--she’s funny, brilliant, compassionate. It’s a marvelous show. If you like All Creatures, Endeavour, or—
—Father Brown.
Ignore him. It’s really good.
3) The Handmaid’s Tale – Somewhere in the second season Handmaid fell out of favor; it just didn’t let up. And now you don’t even really hear it get talked about, which is maybe why it took me most of a year to finally watch season four.
I’m so glad I did, though. It’s a bumpy start, but then such a ride. Basically June has become the leader of the revolution against Gilead, which sounds noble and great but on the ground has made her a lot more like Aunt Lydia. The season takes some HUGE turns.
THREE THREADS
(Okay that one’s less a thread than a funny tweet followed by a variety of comments but still.)
One other fun thing I found this week: Give this two names or terms and it makes the beginning of a story for you.
Here’s what I got when I put in “Hermione Granger” and “Darth Vader”:
Hermione Granger was a typical girl. She loved to play the violin and read books. She was also very shy, which made her difficult to get to know. Darth Vader, a powerful Sith Lord, found her interesting. He wanted to know everything about her and what made her so special.
Hermione Granger, turned to the dark side…it sells itself!
Well, I hope you all have a great week!
Two weeks.
*sigh* Yep. Two weeks. (Can you tell how fried my brain is?)
I mean, you’ve been basically ripping off Chip Zdarsky’s newsletter this whole issue, but that’s pretty much standard for you.
Please pray for me in this difficult time. And have a great week!
You already said that.
*ARGH*
