EPISODE 511: SPOOKY WEE THING
I can KICK and so can you.
POP CULTURE SPIRIT WOW
So at this point I have washed my hands so much they look like this:
The one hand is so much bigger than the other because it is FULL OF WATER.
Of late I’ve found myself thinking of all the time I’ve spent watch medical shows and how little attention I’ve paid to the innumerable shots of doctors washing their hands before surgery. In fact, to the extent that I noticed them at all I think I discounted those moments. I mean, it’s just soap. How can that help save lives?
Oh boy.
Before the medical crisis swept the States I was sort of stunned by our collective ability to respond to this moment with memes. That was definitely not included in The Stand.
These days I’m finding myself less and less on Twitter, where I found that happening originally, just because I’d like not to find myself throwing myself out the window.
But you know, even with where we are now, the memes do continue. And where originally they seemed like deep denial, now I look on them as a kind of triumph of the human spirit. We may be freaked out and living like mole people – I mean, imagine for just one second what it must be like for the aliens watching us from Alpha Centuari right now.
Wait, they’re still indoors?
Yes.
Like, ALL of them?
YES.
And is there something else on the paths they’re usually on? A predator of some kind?
No.
So… it’s just empty then?
Yeah.
The whole thing.
YES.
…It must be some religious thing.
But no matter what, we continue to be clever and caring and to laugh.
A friend in Australia posted this from a sidewalk near her house. Any other time in the last 100 years it would be an absolute non-event.
Now it’s another little moment of people trying to help each other, every way they know how.
You know what else is getting me through? Trips down the Google rabbit hole.
A couple weeks ago I started this book Lurking by Joanne McNeil about the ways we all interact online. It just came out, and literally the only thing more unintentionally a propos of this moment is comedian Marc Maron’s new Netflix special, End Times Fun.
So McNeil has this idea how you can learn so much about and empathy for our fellow human beings just through a Google search. Pick an age, any age, and type this: “I am X AGE and”. And watch the different prompts Google offers you. These are supposedly the most common things people typing that same beginning are asking.
I typed “I am 50 and…” Here’s what I got.
It doesn’t exactly fill one with excitement about turning 50 does it?
Then again, here’s what I got for “I am 18 and…”:
So yeah, it’s tough all over.
The one age I found that seemed a lot more fun? 10.
I am Nujood Age 10 and Divorced is a 2008 book by a Yemenese girl about escaping her arranged marriage. Otherwise there’s some pretty great stuff. My personal favorite: “I am 10 and What is This.” I absolutely believe some of my nephews and nieces have at some point typed this.
So I’m looking at “I am 50 and…”, and there’s that one that doesn’t look like the others. Do you see it?
So then I google that. Here’s what comes up:
I don’t know about you but for me that is six minutes of full immersion distraction. Molly Shannon, you are a god.
Here’s another Fun with Google game I’ve been playing:When it’s someone’s birthday, I try to search for memes that fit them.
So for instance, one of the guys in my house teaches philosophy and has a good sense of humor. And boy did I find gold for him.
Then a few days later this popped up in my feed “randomly” (wink wink) on Facebook:
Maybe they were thinking Phenomenology of Spirits?
(I’ve been riding that joke all day, getting zero traction, and I refuse to submit.)
So basically Google is basically the yarn to my human cat. We gotta take joy where we can find it, people.
You know one other thing that’s giving me joy right now? This:
That’s not from December. People are putting Christmas lights back up to try and help one another feel better.
Again, could never have imagined that happening, but God I love that idea.
So that’s me. How are you doing? What’s keeping you going these days?
Are you getting antsy? I feel like that’s our greatest enemy right now. Patience is so freaking hard.
If you’re out there getting tempted to make another trip to the store, or just stop by and see someone quick, I am here to tell you, put it off. You can make it another week or another couple days. You can.
I’ll bet you dollars to donuts this is not the hardest thing you’ve had to do in your life, and you did that. So be strong.
Man the Thronesters will never let it go.
Then again, you should see all the notes I typed in as I read the novelization of The Rise of Skywalker. In summary:
If you get the novelization, don’t be fooled by its self-description as “Expanded Edition”. It has a couple extra pages about Zorii Bliss and maybe a page more about the new lead general of the Empire. You know, like we all wanted…
There is a little bit at the end that explains the whole Ben-Rey dyad thing that is interesting. Like you now how there’s always only two Sith? That’s all about trying to force a dyad. (Not that it ever works.)
Also, somehow the passing things across space as a dyad is supposed to beof the same phenomenon as Luke sending his spirit to save everyone at the end of Last Jedi. Not only that, but when Leia reaches out to Ben, she’s doing the same thing. And the Emperor, too, when he fell to his death in Return of the Jedi. The creepy body we see in Rise is a clone (ugh) which has been implanted with his consciousness.
Never say JJ didn’t know how to take a cool idea and chew it up, I guess?
I was desperate for Rise to help me feel better about the movie. Instead it only made the film’s flaws more clear. Basically: everything in Rise is about Rey and her identity. And that’s way too narrow a focus. Star Wars films always mix the personal/spiritual and the political. While Luke is getting his Dagobah on, Han, Leia and Chewie are fleeing through the asteroid belt. When Luke goes to the Death Star to deal with his dad’s crappy boss, Leia and the gang go to Endor to try and help the Rebellion.
Rise needed to have Rose and Billie Dee out there on the hustings trying to gather support for the last push. After all the big question of the film is not at all who Rey is but is this darkness ever going to end? Can the Resistance overcome?
Here’s my last little kvetch, hopefully forever: In Star Wars, everybody is somebody. That’s the magic of that universe. Every single character in every Star Wars movie gets a name, gets an action figure and has huge fans. Every. One.
Okay, almost every one.
The essential problem with Rise is that almost everyone is really there just to help move Rey either forward or back. Even Ben, who seems to be her co-star, becomes so marginal once he dumps the Kylo persona HE DOESN’T EVEN GET A LINE.
Rose is the most egregious example, but scratch the surface and very few characters are really allowed to have an arc of their own here. Finn—co-lead of the first two films – is here more like supporting puppy dog than actual flesh and blood character. They don’t even allow him to say the one thing he’s wanted to say the whole film. How weird was that?
Billy Dee shows up – BILLY DEE -- and he just gets two cameos. And that’s even though it turns out he has this insanely crazy sad back story of his own child being stolen by the First Order.
(The other great idea of the novelization is that the First Order actively targeted the children of the original series so as to destroy all trace of hope from the original rebels’ lives. And the seduction of Ben Solo was part of that.
Imagine what this film could have been if it focused on that?)
Okay, ranting now. I’ll stop.
In other news, CBS AllAccess is giving people access for free for a month. That means for free you can watch Picard, which was sensational; all three seasons of The Good Fight, also fantastic; Star Trek Discovery; and CBS shows like Evil, which I am kind of getting into.
I know, everyone is all about their Netflix right now, but get on board. (The promo code is GIFT, and you can use it anytime before April 23rd.)
++ LINKS ++
Haven’t been reading a lot of articles lately. Honestly the internet is like one big Universal Studios Screamoween event right now for me. Everywhere I go I’m afraid of some new scary story jumping out. And you know, mostly they do!
But here are three links that I did find that you might love:
1) How This is the Moment Generation X was Made For.
I’m always in for an article reminding people that we exist and that we are awesome.
2) Remember Norah Jones from everywhere about ten years ago? Well, like many wonderful artists, she did a little live concert from her home last week. It’s excellent.
3) And lastly, because it is likely the animals that will save us, I give you a whole Facebook page about dogs.
We’re not out of the woods yet. At times that can be really scary.
But we’re all still right here together, pruney hand in pruney hand (ish), walking this road. And one day a time, we will get through this.
So keep feeding your spirit and your imagination and your hope with whatever you need. And let’s keep trying to spread a little joy in unexpected places to others along the way, too.
You don’t have to be Molly Shannon to KICK!
